Author: pastordarryl68

It is my experience that the church can unintentionally send the wrong message AND those seeking absolution can receive the wrong message through ignorance and/or confusion. We must be crystal clear.

Those who are regenerated to “new life in Christ” – those who are redeemed, reconciled, and restored to relationship with their Creator through the shed blood of their Savior and the indwelling of His Holy Spirit – the Bible does not speak of them TRYING to be holy or TRYING to pursue righteousness. They just do – Spirit-filled believers pursue the things of the Spirit of God.

There is no such thing as “guilting” a believer into trying to behave righteously.

There is no such thing as “shaming” a new believer to the point that he/she begins to pursue righteousness.

There is no believer in whom the flesh is more powerful – bears more fruit – than the Spirit of God.

A dead tree bears no fruit or foliage…no matter how much you preach to it, guilt it, or shame it.

A tree that’s been made alive by God’s Spirit, bears the fruit of the Spirit because it’s the life of the Spirit that flows through its roots, trunk, and branches. The blight of death no longer has a hold on a tree filled with new life.

That doesn’t mean that the blight of sin won’t TRY to be a hindrance to a living tree. It might stunt the growth of some fruit. It might spoil a piece of fruit or two. It might even steal the life away from a branch or two. The regenerated tree is not perfect BUT sin will not REIGN in the tree, sin will not have a hold on the tree because of the life of the Spirit of God that pulses through the tree.

The duty of a Christian parent is not to convert our children. We can’t do that. It’s not in our power. It should be our prayer and our hope that that will be the outcome of our parenting. Every child is an independent soul who will give an account to God on their own for how they responded to the Gospel.

Our duty is to ensure that under our parenting, our children have no excuse. We have the responsibility to ensure that our children have been taught God’s Ways, that they have been disciplined according to God’s Ways, that God’s Ways have been modeled for them, that the Gospel has been made clear by their parents, that they understand its message, that they understand its demands upon their life, namely to repent and believe. That is our ultimate aim in parenting.

If there is more concern and more energy in your home devoted to helping your child become the next star in whatever field that you or they have chosen (for whatever reason) rather than working toward godliness and their understanding of what it means to follow Christ, then your parental priorities are messed up.

There is a 0.0296% chance that a child will become a professional athlete.

We are dead people who have been made alive, humanity that has been regenerated, redeemed, and reconciled with our Creator to fulfill His plans for our dominion as rulers on the earth.

We live differently. We parent differently than the rest of the world. We prioritize differently than the rest of the world around us.

THE PATH TO A LONELY, EMPTY AND MISERABLE LIFE…

– always be right/never apologize because you’re never wrong

– always blame others/never assume fault

– always look for the hidden agenda/never trust anyone

– always be defensive/never proactive

– always judge others for being judgmental/never let God be in control

– always hurt others to protect yourself/never be vulnerable enough to allow others to get close enough to you to see your pain or weakness

– always read into the motives of others/never take a statement at face value.

Those who are faithfully invested and committed to relationship/community/family are rarely to blame for the “disconnect” of those who are hit and miss to the same relationships.

Whether it’s a father or mother, a grandparent or a friend, those who are present and invested are naturally going to grow deeper in relationship and spiritual intimacy with one another than those who are not. Those who cannot be present are going to have to work harder and be more committed to stay connected in the relationship if they want the same intimacy shared by the others in the relationship.

As followers of Jesus, our objective in parenting is so very clear and very simple. It’s not easy, but it’s not complicated either. There is little room for confusion or being overwhelmed by choices about how to be an intentional, Spirit-filled parent to our children.

The objective of intentional, Spirit-filled parenting is the exact same as our ultimate goal in everything else in life as a believer. It is to bring glory to God and glory to God alone. We raise our children for the glory of God. Our number one desire for our children should be that they KNOW God through faith in Jesus Christ and EVERYTHING that we do and feel and speak of and teach our children should ALWAYS be for that goal and that goal alone – that they KNOW God and glorify HIM as their Creator and Designer and Savior.

If we’re honest, many times in parenting we major on the minors and end up minoring on the majors – specifically raising our children FOR the glory of God and teaching them to glorify Him AS God. Keep the main thing the main thing. Remember the difference between the benefits of parenting and the purpose of parenting:

• My children are my best friends. (benefit)
• They act/look just like me. (benefit)
• They’ve honed some great skills and natural talents. (benefit)
• They’re gifted with intelligence and they’ve worked hard for that. (benefit)
• They’re making a lot of money and are successful at what they do. (benefit)
• They’re happily married and have a nice home. (benefit)
• They’ve acquired a nice amount of material possessions for themselves. (benefit)
• They’re popular and well-liked. (benefit)

These can all be some wonderful benefits…never the goal. If we make these things the goal, then we’ve failed God, we’ve failed our children and we’ve failed our community.

These might very well be some of the benefits of raising children for the glory of God and teaching them to glorify Him as God, but they should NEVER be the goal and may never manifest as benefits…but eternal benefits there will be.

Insecurity is a weapon of the enemy that disables from two directions:

1. It convinces you that you are unwanted, uninteresting, unfriendly, annoying, etc, and convinces you to isolate yourself from others. And then,
2. It conversely sends the message to others that you don’t care about them or want to be in relationship with them, that they are unwanted, uninteresting, unfriendly, annoying, etc.

So how do I overcome this insecurity? How do I get past feeling like people don’t want to know me? How do I prevent from spreading it to others?

1. I lose my identity in Jesus and I take on HIS identity. So many times we combat insecurity with “confidence”, a false sense of strength, which is really arrogance which is just another form of insecurity. It’s not about confidence in ME; it’s about being conformed into His image.
2. I realize that I am a new creature, that I am filled by His Spirit and His Spirit is in possession of me.
3. I realize that it’s not about me or what people think of me. It’s about where His Spirit puts me and what He wants to do through me in the lives of people with whom he has put me in community.
4. I realize that He brought me from death into life to give my life purpose and meaning, to bring glory to Him by relating to others and AS HIS VESSEL OF CHANGE, reconciling a broken humanity with a God who wants to restore them to His glory.

It starts with spending time together with intentional, Spirit-filled purpose.

People will tell you that they believe in God, yet they do not live out that belief any way near what would line up with the Word of God. But this may not necessarily be an intentional or conscious lie on their part.

The god that many “believe in” is often a compilation of preferences, images, stories, and myths we’ve heard and molded into a deity that we can wrap our heads around, accept, and worship. This god is not necessarily the God we come to know from The Bible, the God who desires an intimate relationship with His creation, the God who brings light out of darkness, the God who brings life out of death, the God who brings order out of chaos, the God whose law is perfect, a law in which His worshipers meditate day and night.

Deuteronomy 6:5-9; Joshua 1:8; Psalm 1:1,2; Proverbs 6:22

For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. [21] For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. [22] Claiming to be wise, they became fools, [23] and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. [24] Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, [25] because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.

Romans 1:20-25 ESV

Have you noticed how often we grieve, express remorse, offer apologies and/or try to fix the CIRCUMSTANCES in the lives of people that are going through a valley – things that happen in life that we claim to believe are under sovereign providence…God’s constant care for and absolute rule, for His glory and the good of His people?

God’s “best life now” for me/you – if we’re completely honest, it rarely ever looks like the “best life” we imagine for ourselves – carefree, everything falling into place, nothing negative happening, money to burn, friends-a plenty, etc. This often happens because we are ignorant, controlling, and/or self-centric…often encouraged by heretical teachings.

This might also be because the god we believe in and worship is often a fabrication of our own compilation and rarely the God we come to know from His Word.

God is SOMETIMES glorified and I am made more like Jesus by walking THROUGH the valley. Sometimes He places me there…sometimes I dug myself into the valley. Just walk through it with me…it may not be His plan for you to get me out of the valley. He might just want you to encourage me and exhort me, love me and assist me as He grows me IN the valley.

**it’s not wrong to empathize or sympathize with the struggle that someone is going thru as tough things in life occur.

— “I’m sorry you’re struggling with paying your bills.”

— “My sympathies for the loss that you are feeling.”

— “I hate to hear that you are not able to resolve the conflicts in your marriage.”

— “I’m sorry that person’s terrible choices are affecting you this way”.

But if I believe that God is sovereign, then I can’t be sorry or grieve that we are in His constant care and under His absolute rule…nothing happens to us outside of His authoritative care. I can’t grieve that God is going to get glory and work all things together for the good of those who love Him THROUGH the things that we don’t like are happening to us or around us.

There’s an endless number of people publicly shaming and blaming presidents, majority leaders, czars, spouses, parents, employers, doctors, pastors, etc. for the adverse conditions in our lives and the failure of others to meet “my” conditions of comfort. Soooooooo much finger-pointing and so little self-reflection. Mirrors are used today for ego and vanity rather than to reflect what’s really there.

That’s not to excuse the behaviors of those who do wrong in the sight of God and man. There ARE consequences for our actions. God IS going to hold each of us accountable for our actions.

But this is an indictment on the way that we often behave when humans do what they inevitably do…sin.

It’s a revelation that we often attack the fruit issues and ignore the root problem.

It’s the painful truth that we often rely on the wrong things to “get us through” or “right the wrong”.

God is sovereign…He is in constant care for and absolute rule over my life, my marriage, my children, my country, my friends, my foes. HIS care and HIS rule are for HIS glory and the good of HIS people. He is in control when it seems that no one is…and He allows things to happen for HIS glory and the good of HIS people. Sometimes, rather than being shielded, we need to be broken. Sometimes, rather than shooting at the dark, we need to learn who the real enemy is. Sometimes we fire the weapons of this world when what we really need is His armor, simply to stand.

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." 
Ephesians 6:10-12 

"What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:31-35,37-39